Wendy's Pregnancies

Cecilia

Beautiful Cecilia. I didn't want to know the sex of the baby but the ultrasound technician accidentally slipped. After the shock of finding out that we were having a girl before she was born I felt 100% decided on the name Cecilia. While I was in labor with Gracie my husband looked at me and said, "Honey, you can name the baby whatever you want." So I knew I would also have last say with "Cecilia" if my heart was really set on it.

Her due date was Christmas of 2001, though I thought for sure she was going to come early, because it was my second baby and everyone told me the second baby comes early. Wrong. Six days past my due date, we took Gracie to the zoo and I tried to put myself into labor by walking for four hours up and down hills in the rain. It didn't work. Finally on New Years Day, my gorgeous 9lb, 3oz, 22" little girl was born via vaginal birth after 14 hours of labor.

Induction started at 11 a.m. on December 31st with a petocin drip. After having given birth naturally with Gracie, I thought for sure that I would not have an epidural with Cecilia. After all, nothing could be worse than my labor experience with Gracie and I got her out without any drugs. Well, was I in for a big surprise. Once I started active labor with Cecilia, I was again throwing up and starting to feel like my pelvis was separating.

Soon, I started to have back labor, which I did not have with Gracie. The only way to describe back labor is that it feels like an entire army is sticking knives into your lower back and turning them all at the same time. It doesn't go away, it's constant. Once again I found myself begging for an epidural. When the anesthesiologist arrived I wasn't even afraid of the needle going into my back – I welcomed it, because I knew the relief it was going to bring. Soon, I was in epidural heaven joking with my "New Years Eve" room full of family members. We were all sporting New Years hats made out of whatever could be found in the hospital room cabinets - upside down bedpans with napkins taped on them reading "Happy New Year" and inflated purple surgical gloves attached to them. The nurses were even requesting a "custom design."

Once I made it to ten centimeters it was time to push. I was ready to experience the "no pain" delivery. So I started pushing just like Marissa had taught me to do with Gracie but my nurse informed me that nothing was happening. The epidural was working so well that I thought I was pushing so hard but really wasn't. Then came the bad news, they were going to have to turn the epidural down. Well, that didn't help either so I had to lose it completely. I was hoping that the back labor would now be gone since the baby was so far down. But, as the epidural wore off, I was quickly realizing that I was not so lucky.

I started throwing up from the pain. Now that I was feeling everything again, it was time to push. But it was futile. The intense back labor made it impossible to move all of my strength down so low. By now, I was pleading for them to turn the epidural back on, or to give me a C-Section. After Gracie's birth, I knew how to push out a baby but this was just physically impossible with an army of knives in my back.

Finally, my anesthesiologist came back and said she might be able to dull the back labor with narcotics. I really didn't want to have the narcotics but she thought it might help enough so that I could at least push enough to get the baby out. My husband and I agreed to give it a go. The narcotics dulled the pain just enough so that I could at least push. Now, Cecilia's head was coming down very quickly. I was so ready to get her out and she was coming so fast, that as they were wheeling me into the delivery room I was having to breath through the pushing urges so that she wouldn't come out. I remember screaming, "Tell me what to do! Can I push yet? I need to push!" When they told me finally to push I thought for sure she was going to come right out. But I could literally feel the enormity of this baby and it felt like she was stuck.

I was saying, "Did you do the episiotomy yet? Do it! Do it! Do it!" It was amazing. It honestly felt like there was a basketball stuck down there! After they told me the episiotomy was completed I pushed so hard and out came my beautiful little baby girl. I never thought that I would get her out, I truly believed it was impossible. The midwife held the baby in the air and said "no wonder you couldn't get her out you poor thing, this baby is huge." And I so clearly remember looking at the baby as she held her up and thinking to myself, "How did she ever fit inside of me? She's huge!"

I'm so thankful to my nurses, midwife and doctor for not giving me an unnecessary C–Section and making me brave the pain, which is a natural and even empowering part of giving birth.

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